The P.A.I.R. Framework is the bridge between understanding productive networking and successfully doing it. It’s a repeatable tool for approaching anyone, anywhere, with purpose.
I’ve designed it to help you implement the Productive Networking Model in real-time. It stands for:
- P: Positive observation
- A: Ask about intent
- I: Introduce yourself
- R: Retain the connection
Why start with a positive observation?
P: Positive Observation
Overused, scripted conversation starters like “how are you” and “what do you do” put everyone’s brain on autopilot. Instead, make a positive observation about the event you’re at.
This begins the conversation with a personalized, relevant topic.
How this can sound: “I didn’t expect a workshop on discrimination in the workplace to be so positive, but it was very empowering. Were you also surprised?”
A: Ask About Intent
Inquire about why someone attended the event. This is as simple as asking “What made you come to this event today?”
This creates an opening for someone to introduce themselves in the context of the event. It also allows you to see if there’s any overlap between your goals and look for ways that you can support each other.
Here are some examples of conversations that can stem from understanding someone’s goals at a professional event.
| Relationship | Conversation |
| Two people are looking for jobs in a similar field | Have you learned anything helpful so far? Have you encountered any surprises about this industry in the Netherlands? I’ve learned X, Y, Z. |
| One person is job searching and the other is employed in a different field | Is there anything different in your field here than in the Netherlands? Were there any cultural surprises when you started working at your company? |
| One person is new to the Netherlands, while the other person is well established here | What do you wish you had known when you first moved here? Is there anything you’d do differently? |
Opening with this question instead of “how are you, what’s your name?” immediately focused the conversation on what you have in common. After discussing intent, it’s time for an introduction.
I: Introduce yourself
Many conversations start with an introduction, but it’s almost impossible to retain someone’s name when you’re just meeting.
This is especially true in a group setting, where several people go around and introduce themselves at once. If one member of the circle can initiate a conversation instead of a round of forgettable “hi, I’m [name] and I do [marketing]” introductions, everyone will benefit.
Respond to someone’s intent by sharing your own motives for attending, then introduce yourself in the context of your goals.
How this can sound: “I can really relate to your reason for coming today because I’m also job searching. By the way, I’m [name] and I [work in marketing]…”
R: Retain the Connection
Retention is essential for any interesting connection. The most natural way to connect at professional events is on LinkedIn.
Strategic networkers will have a LinkedIn QR code set as their phone background so that event attendees can quickly scan it to connect. Rana of INDSponsors taught me this trick at a networking event, and I can’t believe I ever connected with people the manual way.
By initiating this and offering your QR code to scan, you do a few things simultaneously:
- Impression: Proactive and savvy, making a strong impression.
- Organization: This guarantees a list of connection requests waiting in your inbox for easy follow-up after the event.
- Easy out: If you wish not to connect with someone but they’ve initiated this step, you can have them send you a request and simply not accept it when the event ends.
How this can sound: “Can we connect on LinkedIn before I go?” [offers QR code on phone]
This is where relationships move from the real-life networking event onto LinkedIn’s 24/7 networking event.